I’ve been spamming facebook for days and days, it just causes shit cos my ex sees everything i write, it makes me seem clingy and annoying but i need to get it out my system and write it somewhere, it’s a bad habit.
So yeah, i realized i could just turn to tumblr and write a bunch of shit here cos nobody would really judge cos all my followers are either close friends or people i hardly know.
Now i’ve got to it, i don’t know what to say.
Basically i’ve fucked up everything, the person i fell hardest for has left me for one of the most gorgeous girls i know, she’s lovely and she’s meant to be one of my closest friends, i can’t help how they feel i guess but i swear he’s just doing it for my attention cos i know he did love me, quite alot.
People always tell me he didn’t but i can read him like a book, we broke up like 4 times and whenever we did i’d still class him as mine, if people asked if always be like ”oh yeah, that’s my boyfriend.” cos it just felt right to say it and we never moved on, we knew we’d be back together within a week or so?
And now he’s got a girlfriend, it’s like what the actual fuck? :l
I don’t know what to do, i love him so much and he said he’s not over me but he’s moved on so quick, i would say he didn’t love me at all but after everything we’ve been through, i don’t see how he couldn’t of?
Last night we had the first proper conversation in ages, i stayed up all night just cos i was happy to get his attention and i only had like 2 hours sleep but i woke up the happiest person ever then by the time i get him i try to talk to him and he just blanks me. I would try to talk to him but i’ll come across as clingy and i don’t want him to think that i’m some unstable emotional wreck even if that’s what i’m like now.
I just wish i could go back and make everything work again cos this is my biggest fucking regret.